Thanksgiving turns me into a singing fool. Once I'm in the car and I hear those Christmas songs I can't help but singing... well, my wife will tell you that I'm not really singing, I'm just imitating whatever song might be playing. I could be making drum sounds or singing falsetto. I'm just as likely to be adding filler between phrases as I am to be near the melody. This happens unconsiously. I'll be driving in the car wondering what the awful screeching is, thinking that I may have to take my car into the mechanic when I realize that awful screeching is me.
However there is one phenomenon that produces sounds more awful than my voice. I call it the Trans-Siberian Crap-Roller. It may not be a song from the Trans-Siberian Orchestra or a piece by Mannheim Steamroller, but you know what type of music I'm talking about. It starts with a casio-drum beat. Then an un-holy mix of trumpets, violins, electric guitar and synthesizer starts. I half expect the Disneyland Parade of Lights to start. I wouldn't be suprised to look in my rearview mirror and seeing a giant lightbulbed turtle or a cinderella's 30,000 watt dress chasing me. Then come the orchestra hits, pounding out of my stereo like the conductor has Tourettes. Whenever this genre of 'music' comes on I switch my radio faster than if it was playing 'I Can Only Imagine' for the fourth time in an row. I dislike their sound, but they somehow have found their niche in life. Even 20 years after their album came out they still tour every December. They're the Orchestral version of Martin Lawrence. Daa-mn Gina!
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